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The Forest or the Couch? How to use the power of your mind to make the right choices



Sometimes the quiet whisper of my soul asks for me to immerse myself in beautiful and wholesome things.


Like the exhilarating scent of the forest or the icy chill of the sea in winter. That whisper feels like a beacon of light through stormy seas.


Other times that same hushed voice asks for the banal and mindless.


Like binge-watching an entire series on Netflix or lying in bed reading a throwaway novel. That alternative voice feels like comfy loungewear on a grey day.


This Christmas, week I’ve been totally in the latter phase. Hunkering down on the couch with chocolates and letting Netflix do it’s thing (I just watched the entire series of “Bridgertons”. It was great!).

I used to doubt the low-brow demands


For a long time it was horrifying to think that the deepest part of myself might want to just sit back and let go. Almost a betrayal of my lofty ideals.


Surely, given the perfect conditions, I would always choose the path that leads me to deep and meaningful pursuits?


I’d feel really guilty if I wanted to just lie on the couch and do nothing.


So I would doubt that instinct and if I felt pulled towards closing the curtains and curling up on a chair I would race to find something more worthy to do or worse, I would still do it but not actually relax.

But it turns out that, at least for me, that's not what honouring myself looks like


When I trust myself completely, I know that if I want to sack everything off and do nothing it won't last forever.


That even the most binge-worthy of shows will eventually leave me restless for activity (or I’ll finish the series 😂!).


That it's safe and ok to listen and do what I need, even if the judging part of my mind tells me it's a waste of time.

The key is making a conscious choice


There's no such thing as a bad choice if it's made from a place of truly listening to what you need.


If I go for a walk in the woods because I feel like I "should" but really my body is craving rest and recuperation then it's likely that I'll still feel disconnected.


Likewise, if i snuggle under my duvet to watch an epic marathon of TV but it's because i want to avoid feeling something dark and complicated, then I'll end up feeling grubby and disappointed in myself.

How can you trust yourself?


In reality, we've all made choices from both places: from the aligned and truest version or, in contrast, from the afraid and hidden parts of ourselves.


It's not the action we take that determines if it's the right thing to do, it's the energy and intention behind it. So if you've found yourself being drawn to "bad" activities, please stop right now and let yourself hear this.


You are allowed to do what you want to do.


You are allowed to want to do things which seem lazy and unproductive.


BUT (there's always a but!), only if you truly listen to what you need first.

Awareness is the beginning


So how can you make sure you are acting with your own best interests?


One way is to drop into stillness each day, even just for a few minutes. That quiet whisper? It needs you to be silent first so you can hear it.


That's why learning how to meditate is such a powerful tool in your life.


It will allow you to hear yourself better so that you can make the right choices for YOU, moment by moment.

How to build Ninja Mind Skills


I call the ability to manage the conditions inside of yourself 'Ninja Mind Skills'.


It's not a one size fits all or static process. Rather it's a way to adapt and be flexible within your own mind, with a big dose of kindness for yourself along the way.


You can learn to experience things differently so you can trust yourself more and feel less stressed by the realities of our modern world that never stops.


If you'd like to build some Ninja Mind Skills in the New Year, my new 21 Day Ninja Mind Skills Programme is launching on January 10th. (My Ninja Tribe community will have access to the programme as part of their membership).


It's available at a steal of a price right now as I want to help as many people as I can to start the year right.


You can find out more here and if you purchase the programme before the end of 2020, then you'll also receive a free 30 minute 1:1 with me.