Outside the sky is grey and, as I look out through the rain spattered windows, it's like it's stripped all the colour from the landscape. Even the ivy that creeps up the garden wall seems a dull and muted green. "I should go for a walk" bubbles up as a thought in my mind. But I don't feel like it. "I should go and sort the laundry" pops up next. I don't feel like that either. Hmm, what DO I feel like doing? To answer that I need to know how I feel which means dropping under

When my kids were tiny (but big enough to be enthusiastic Christmas tree decorators), I told a little white lie. I said there were special fairies that came and decorated Christmas trees for us. All we had to do was leave the decorations out and they would do the rest. The year before the tree had looked so awful, I couldn’t bear it. Everything lopsided and crammed into one 3-year-old-sized corner. I wanted the tree to look nice that year…hence the fairy story. It only ha

I let my eyes close. I can hear the rustling of foil. There’s a gentle tug on my scalp and the chill of dye cream touching my scalp. In the background I can hear the roar of hairdryers, slow atmospheric tunes, the rising and falling of voices and the gentle patter of rain on the window. Outside it’s getting dark and even with my eyes closed I can sense the afternoon slipping away. I’m here in this moment and yet I’m also transported. The many versions of me As I let my min